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If My Child Ever Says: “I’m Gay”

ifmy child

The other day on Facebook one of my friends shared a video and the caption read: “‘What did you think when I told you I was gay?’ Some laughs and hugs are shared between fathers and their kids.”

The video was heartwarming and sweet… and filled with the way my flesh would want to respond if my child ever said: “Mom, I’m gay.” But I don’t live by the flesh.

“So I say walk by the Spirit and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. For the flesh craves what is contrary to the Spirit, and the Spirit what is contrary the flesh. They are opposed to one another.” Galatians 5:16-17

You see, it breaks my heart to picture having that conversation with my child because my flesh wants to respond like these parents did saying things like: “Just be who you are.” or “I always knew you were gay, I’m glad you are finally coming out and letting everyone officially know.” or “It’s your choice.”

But here’s the deal, if my child came to me and said: “Mom, I’m a liar and I am going to fully accept that and embrace it because it’s how I was born.” or “Mom, I am a thief, always have been always will be and there’s no sense fighting it any longer.” or “Mom, I’m a drunk. I crave alcohol day and night and I’m tired of struggling against it. It’s time for me to come out as the drunkard I am and be proud of it!” If one of my children said anything like that to me I would be crushed because what they are saying to me is: “Mom, I am no longer going to fight my flesh or live by the Spirit. I am going to fully gratify my fleshly desires and everything it craves. I no longer will die to self and seek to walk by the Spirit. I am choosing to not live for Christ but for myself. ” 

“Do you not know that the wicked will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: Neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practice homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor verbal abusers, nor swindlers, will inherit the kingdom of God.… 1 Corinthians 6:9-10

Look at the list in there of those who will not inherit the kingdom of God: the sexually immoral, the adulterer, homosexuals, thieves, drunkards etc. It’s not that homosexuality is worse than all those things. It’s that the church and others are openly embracing this sin (even in their own children) while still being opposed to their children being drunks, thieves, greedy etc. 

This is what I would say if my child said: “I’m gay.” 

“Honey, I love you with all my heart and I want the very best for you. But do you know who loves you even more? Your Creator. The Lord Almighty. The very One that formed you in my womb! He loves you more than me and He knows even better than I do what is best for you and His best for you is not to live in and embrace homosexuality just as His best for you is not to live in and embrace whatever other fleshly desires and cravings you have. We all, Mommy included, have to make that choice daily to walk according to the Spirit and not the flesh. We all have to daily take up our cross and follow Him knowing that whatever temporary cravings our flesh have are not worth sacrificing our eternal state. If you choose to openly walk in the homosexual lifestyle you must recognize you are openly saying: ‘I don’t want to follow Christ. I want to follow my flesh. I don’t want to inherit the kingdom of God but I want to follow the father of lies.'”

Satan is doing a terrifying work in the hearts of men and women and their view of sin. Not only in the world but also in the hearts of those who claim to be Christian. But don’t forget this: “…there is no truth in him, whenever he speaks a lie, he speaks from his own nature, for he is a liar and the father of lies.” John 8:44

We don’t get to decide what is sinful and what is not. God does. That is part of what makes Him God. Satan, the father of lies, is doing everything in his power to make what God says is sin something we embrace and say: “no, that is not a sin”. Unfortunately, he is having a great deal of success.

Do not be deceived dear children and parents. The loving action is to rebuke sin in our children’s lives and point them toward Christ, not condone their sin and point them toward the path of destruction.

no greater joy

Have you checked out my husband’s book, Marriage God’s Way?

3 thoughts on “If My Child Ever Says: “I’m Gay”

  1. This was an excellent post, and a perfect reply to the issue of the day. While I expect the world to have ungodly responses to immorality, it is so sad to see the church running to follow the world’s example. Your response was spot on.

    1. Thank you Diana! Don’t want to have to think about these conversations… but we must.

  2. Such a great post.. biblical love always involves taking a risk. It’s so painful lovingly calling sin as sin in our children’s lives sometimes, but we must.thanks for the good example!

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